I'm not anxious but then again i'm not chill either; new years always seem to catch me basically out of sorts, i.e., broke, and alone with little motivation; I use to travel around this time of the year, esp., cause flights are cheaper in the winter but that seems like years ago when i had that kind of disposable cash; Use to mean something to me to at least visit the family, whereas now, i feel like why don't they ever think of visiting me?
I asked my brother Adrian how much for a print of the above image and his reply " ..Hi My prints are 11x14 on archival paper limited edition
usually 5. Price is $300.00 ." a little steep for my budget right now, which has been the case for a lot of other artist work i wished to purchase;
I am the type of guy who falls in love at first sight; somehow, when i see him i know him deeply, trust me i don't see him that often; and having been on a rather bleak dry spell (as regarding love, not sex folks, even though that goes hand in hand for me;) i simply haven't seen (and not for looking, spying and peeking around) a guy until David who actually made my heart race; I wish for such but as my luck would have it, David lives in Barbados, and i of course live in California (in all reality David is probably straight too) So i really should settle for the print; i like both the photographic work and the model; I will have to put some change aside and save for this work though if i really truly want to purchase; perhaps i could break it in half or quarters like 4 payments of $75.00 to best work for me; I rarely save money for anything; truth be told, I rarely save money;
I'm going to take a smoke break,
So I sent the following e-mail to Adrian, the photographer of this work: "since i basically live check to check; so another aid would be if i sent or posted the funds in an account (like say a paypal account for the photographer to wait (?) and see if i can fullfill in the next 4 months (12/09 thru 3/10) then he (you) would be able to release the image to me if i don't fullfill balance then i would simply let you know and close out account (that of course means you too cann't spend it untill the balance is covered). I know, I know, this is a lot of stuff to simply purchase some art but what's a poor boy to do; i mean come say Feb; that $225 may look good for some other personal emergency; with my life..that is not to hard to be true. Are you game for this?
Maybe that will work out for the both of us. I hope he shares or at least pays his models, cause i would like to be of benifit to David as well. I know in Barbados $300.00 is like $600.00 so really that is a nice sum of change.
Length: 8 inches / Width At base: 2.1 inches / Width At Head: 2.36 inches
Reason being, i'm narrow at base (as a whole in fact) but fairly long in the length; o.k.; now u know. All in All i don't like rubbers;
music, music, music,
O.K., This fucking moveable type just fuck'd me up in that I had written this rather lengthy opinion of one Dudley Perkins and clicked save to only have the fucking page reload to log in, whcih meant every thing i thought i was trying to save just got lost; You have to constantly engage with this program otherwise a pause of a few minutes and the system acts as if you have gone and logs you out.
I spoke of how I am playing a game with my Folsom Prison Pen Pal Ryan Marino; in that, i send him a list of music i am considering purchasing, and ask him to select what he would purchasse, then we review the artist and or material we have selected;
I would like to write music reviews, which i did promise here some time ago i would start doing; of course, with me, writing is such a labor and time consuming matter and time is the one item i don't seem to have much esp., with regards, to thoughtful content.
Holy Smokes by Dudley Perkins, is the album up for consideration; Now I have/had other music by Mr Perkins, first of which was the Madlib produced "Lil Light" which i had in LP version; (I have since regretted trading that album cause it contained that little gem "Falling"
Rain come down, rain come down
rain come down, rain come down
I see unnecessary death, I see life just
gone away
I see souls out of control, I see the
earth's pain, I feel the earth's pain
I see the powers of manipulation and I
pass away
I see the sleep walkers who walks
asleep doing it again
I watch how they do the music, I watch
how they do the children
I see wars, I see famine, I see
pestilence
I see disease, break, incest, racism, I
see these things
I seen what the lack of knowledge can
do to a civilzation
I've seen what laziness can do to a
civilzation, lazy people
when you don't stand up for your own
Go ahead and keep beating around the
bush, beating around the bush"
I see with my own blue eyes also and
take care for what I see
believe me I've seen a lot, I participated
in wars"
I've seen so many, so many things
with the help of us could have been set
right
Don't you wanna go to the moon also
don't you wanna enhance your
intelligence
dont you wanna stand up for your own
don't you wanna see with your own
two eyes"
Only you can lift you up, by the will of
God
the powers that be, the energy within
your soul
I hang on the edge of this universe,
singing off key
talking too loud and bracing myself to
cushion the fall
I shall tumble into deep space never in
this former with this feeling
to return to earth, it is not tragic
I shall spound to the black hole losing
sacred limbs
internal organs, severing my naked
soul
that in the next galaxy with only my
essence embracing myself
as I fall into the ill minded mode
That is some brilliant writing; but when I was listening to this material on the LP I failed to grasp the pure poetry of his style; Oh, i caught a glimmer which is why he stays on my play list with this album and "Expressions" which i found a bit more accessible to my feeble mindedness; Yes, I am saying that Mr Perkins is brilliant--i sort of compare him to Miles Davis, in that he requires some learned listening to fully grasp and appreciate his delivery and content; speaking of delivery he reminds me of the Last Poets in both voice and style, but more abstract and intellectual overall; of equal parts political and ethnocentric; I will probably download from my EMusic.com account this album "Holy Smokes" if only on the merits of his previous work. In fact, I am probably bringing all his music back into my current playlist, esp., for headphone listening ; I grasp him better both stereophonic and literally via headphones than on my home speakers; some how his lyrical content is immediately intimate and discernable for me; Perhaps that’s then nature of a true crooner, it’s in your ear or not at all.
musical experiences
thinking too hard about this matter won't be good for me; this image above is part of a larger painting i gave to my man Joesph; if u look real hard you can see two tongues tip to tip; right now it expresses my unrequited desire, if desire can be such a thing.. 
i suppose his walk and the physical manner in which he carries himself; a man who walks with the full knowledge that his body is an object of observation and he almost encourages such observation. 
